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This, of course, was Sony's fake critic that they used for giving fabulous reviews to their products back in 2000-2001. David allegedly wrote for Connecticut's Ridgefield Press. How was he caught as a non-existing entity? He absolutely loved Rob Schneider's The Animal., furthermore bestowing the praise "The producing team of Big Daddy has delivered another winner!" I'm not so sure if someone was investigating mental disorders among members of the media or what, but that one was a red flag for a psychiatric disorder, given that the only people who enjoy Schneider's movies that much tend to be too drunk to remember anything about them the next day.
Well, I hear that David Manning is currently doing a biography of Alan Smithee, based on several years of interviews, which started after Manning loved Bloodsucking Pharaohs in Pittsburgh. He's also doing an extensive book on the filmation of Ilsa Meets Bruce Lee in the Devil's Triangle. I decided to interview him recently, and got the following blurbs from him:
-"If there's two directors who have been snubbed constantly by both the Oscars and Cannes, its Albert Pyun and Greydon Clark."
-"One day, the screenwriter of Batman & Robin will win an Oscar." (what do you know? Prophetic words)
-"Mariah Carey gave the best performance of the year in Glitter."
-"Hardbodies: the best comedy of the 80s, save for Spring Break."
-"Spice World: I can't stop watching it! The cleverness of the screenplay is just too much for me to catch all at once!"
-"If there's one philosophy I have to live by, it is: 'Don't raise the bridge, lower the river.' "
-"Rae Dawn Chong is the hottest sci-fi star ever!"
-"My greatest wish is to do a Pia Zadora film festival."
-"I'm the one responsible for the trend in casting Latinos as Italian-Americans and Italian-Americans as Latinos in major films."
-"I actually understand what Marlon Brando is saying throughout Apocalypse Now."
-"Bruce Le was a better Bruce Lee than Bruce Lee himself."
-"MVP: Most Valuable Primate. Clever title, ain't it?"
I couldn't make much more out of what Mr. Manning was saying. He was too busy manualy stuffing heroin down his veins without the use of any hypodermics, after which he started running with scissors for a few minutes, and eventually he settled down to test what happened when you combined Ny-Quill and Day-Quill.
PM-
